One Thing in Common


In The Speed of Trust, Stephen Covey writes one thing “undergirds and affects the quality of every relationship, every communication…every effort in which we are engaged. That one thing is trust.” While trust traditionally forms the bedrock of all school-family partnerships, it is especially important this school year. From election year politics to social injustices to the pandemic, rarely have we tackled a year like 2020. Uncertainty lies around every corner, and never in my nearly 30 years of independent school education has it been so critically important that schools and families work in partnership to build trust in our communities. 

It’s certainly not surprising to know that students learn best when schools and families have robust partnerships. Yet, those partnerships are much harder to develop and nurture in 2020-21 than they were a year ago. Ironically, the health and safety measures we have in place for the purpose of protecting our community result in the distancing of families from in-person connections. If school is in session at all, parents drop off their children in carline or Hug ‘n’ Go, are restricted from entering campus, and can’t participate in natural community-building activities like meeting on the playground after school. Furthermore, intentional community building efforts such as back-to-school gatherings, community socials, and all-school assemblies are also not part of the “new normal.” How, then, will we build the type of community our constituents can depend on?

Over the course of the past six months I have been collecting advice from experts across a variety of fields (education, business, psychology, and more) that will help us build trust in our community. If we consider these suggestions as the year progresses, we’ll have a much better chance at overcoming the obstacles in our way. And, who knows, maybe we’ll emerge a stronger community as a result.

  1. Assume good intentions and operate from the fundamental premise that families and school personnel have their children’s best interests at heart. Put our students at the center of our thinking. 
  2. Forgive easily and be empathetic to others. Stress and anxiety levels are high and all of us could use some extra breathing room.
  3. Simplify. At school we are focusing on the core tenets of our education and program. Try this at home as well to lift unnecessary burdens.
  4. Communicate frequently, especially informally. Small gestures of gratitude can have a huge influence on trust building.
  5. Be consistent and authentic as we parent and teach our children. They have an incredible ability to see and feel when something’s not right. 
  6. Remember, this is a temporary situation. This, too, shall pass. Be optimistic about the future and think positively.
  7. Don’t forget to play. Our world is full of restrictions; be sure to find time for joy.

Way back in 1997 James Comer and Norris Haynes, Professors at Yale University, wrote an article for Edutopia titled, “The Home-School Team: An Emphasis on Parent Involvement.” In it they remarked, children “constantly observe how the significant adults in their lives treat one another, how decisions are made and executed, and how problems are solved. All the experiences children have, both in and out of school, help shape their sense that someone cares about them, their feelings of self-worth and competency, their understanding of the world around them, and their beliefs about where they fit into the scheme of things.”

As the significant adults in their lives, our job is to deepen our relationships and build our level of trust so that the children we love and the students we serve develop a greater sense of certainty in what are without question uncertain times. If we follow the advice of Comer, Haynes, and others, I am confident we can fulfill Stephen Covey’s assurance that “trust is something [we] can do something about. In fact, [we] can get good at creating it!” Doing so will not only allow us to navigate this school year, but it will also provide a springboard for school-parent partnerships for years to come.

8 Tips for Choosing a Kindergarten Program


There are numerous Kindergarten options available for children and parents. Today, more than ever, parents carefully examine their many choices: open enroll or neighborhood, public or private, full day or part day, morning or afternoon, academic or play-based…So what should a parent look for in a Kindergarten program?

 1. Consider the atmosphere of the school and classroom. Are you greeted warmly when you visit the school? Do the children seem happy, excited to learn, and eager to be there? Do the teachers and administrators create an atmosphere of support and individualized attention. Remember that the early years are a time when children must develop a love of learning and excitement about school. A child’s sense of “I am and I can” is often solidified in kindergarten and that confidence will help to propel them through many more years of school and learning. Chose a school that communicates this message to you.

BCD teachers and staff, from Preschool through to Middle School, are intentional every day in their teaching and dedication to children. We promise to promote a love of learning within a safe and nurturing environment our priority.

2. Small class size is critical. Small class size helps to ensure that your child’s Kindergarten teacher truly knows your child. Small class size coupled with in-depth knowledge of your child means that teachers are better able to support your child strengths, challenges, and opportunities for growth. Many educators talk about the need for differentiating instruction (i.e. tailoring teaching for individual students). However, reality often does not provide the time or resources for this to happen in classrooms. When class size grows, even the best teachers are forced to teach to the median learning level of the students. When your touring schools be sure to ask about how teachers meet a wide variety of learning styles and needs. Be sure to ask about their strategies for acceleration, remediation, and accommodation.

Elementary class sizes at BCD are limited to 18.

3. Teachers support and nurture students as they learn to navigate socially. Academics are important, but strong social skills are critical to success in today’s world. Whether a person is five years old and knocking over another child’s block tower, or is 50-years-old and irritating co-workers at the copy machine – it is the same thing. Social skills, and the life lessons that accompany learning what works and what does not, are a cornerstone of success today. Look for a school that is focused on supporting development of the whole child and is committed to teaching character development.

BCD’s Elementary School Program has an extensive social and emotional support program including: Responsive Classroom trained faculty, a school counselor, and the Kid Power program.

 4. Teachers have support. Do the classroom teachers have the support of the school administration? Are there resource teachers to help ensure that student needs are met? Do teachers have time to collaborate with one another? Do teachers work as a team and share ideas? Do teachers take the time to work one-on-one time and in small groups time with students? Again, do not be afraid to ask these questions. 

BCD teachers have time built into their weekly schedules for grade level collaboration. Additionally, BCD teachers have a monthly collaboration time that focuses on cross-division collaboration or professional development.

5. Every child matters. No child should ever fall through the cracks – PERIOD.

BCD students are known and nurtured everyday by a faculty of many. The Kindergarten team at BCD includes a homeroom classroom teacher, teachers in world language, science, innovation, music, art, physical education, and library, as well as, school counselors, literacy specialists from the BCD Learning Center, the Head of Elementary, and the Head of School.

6. Look for balance. Just about every adult can recall the drone of Charlie Brown’s teacher and the image of children being sucked into a void of boredom. Kindergarten should also be exciting! Look for a balance in the daily routine. Ideally, students should experience a blend of teacher directed and child initiated activities; activities for the large group, small group, and time to work individually or one-on-one with a teacher; time indoors and time outdoors; time to be focused and put pencil to paper and time to just play and have fun. A balanced Kindergarten program will offer challenging academics and variety of enrichment classes (i.e. “specials”) such as art, computer, music, choir, world language, physical education, technology, and science lab.

BCD’s Kindergarten program stands apart in its breadth of enrichment offerings.

7. After school programs are an important factor. If you know that you will need to use a school’s before or after school program (also commonly known as Extended Day, Y-Care, or KinderCare), check out the program. Does the program seem organized? Are classes held afterschool that might interest your child? Is the program easily accessible to families and easy to use? Can you have your child drop-in on an as-needed basis or is a reservation required? In addition, the cost of extended care either before or after school is often significant. Ask about these costs up front.

BCD offers several affordable (and fun!) on-site after-school classes, as well as, daily aftercare. Our After-School Program (After 3 at BCD) is available to use any day you need it – without advance notification or reservation.

8. Trust your instinct when you visit. One of the most important factors to consider is the feel of the classroom and the sense that the children are actively engaged. It is critical that teachers create this foundation through joy, enthusiasm, and a nurturing passion that reminds us all of our most nostalgic memories and positive experiences in elementary school. Avoid the “mompetition” of what others parents say or do and choose a school that feels right for you and your family. The school that feels right is often the best fit for your child.

If you’re still considering your Kindergarten choices for Fall 2020, we invite to take a look at BCD. Call to schedule your tour today.

COVID is Spooky – Halloween doesn’t need to be.

The first time my son, Gus, was old enough to “get” the concept of trick-or-treating was memorable. He donned his firefighting costume, strapped on his oxygen tank, fastened his helmet, and headed out with two very eager parents. What we failed to notice was that before we left the house, Gus had filled his trick-or-treating basket with candy …from our house.

The unveiling of his understanding happened at the first door. Gus rang the bell, said “trick-or-treat,” reached into his basket, and handed the neighbor a piece of candy. It was such a sweet gesture and no matter how many ways we tried to explain, (“Gus, that’s not now it works.”) he kept it up. House to house he went, passing out candy along the way. The evening ended up being **hands down** my favorite Halloween – ever!

Halloween, for many parents, is beloved. It opens the door to creating traditions, making memories, and allowing children the freedom to “try on” other identities. For children, the lead up to October 31st is a BIG part of the fun. For approximately 350+ days, Boulder Country Day School teachers have listened to the children chatter about who/what they are going to “BE.” Spider Man, unicorns, ninjas, Elsa, witches, tigers… And, yet with fewer than 10 days to go, many of us fear that COVID may kibosh the children’s planning and scare the fun right out of treasured holiday traditions.

Below are some tips and tricks to help ensure that your family does not say BOO! to celebrating Halloween:

Don’t Skip… Flip (Traditional Trick or Treating)!

•            Consider rethinking the model. Before heading out with your children, fill up a basket of candy to carry with you. As you walk through your neighborhood, decide what you and your child will look for and put a piece of candy in your child’s basket each time you see a decorated house, a witch, skeletons, a front yard cemetery… Approach the idea with a scavenger hunt mindset. Get creative!

•            If you feel that you cannot skip traditional trick-or-treating, look for houses that have candy spread out “grab-and-go” style so that children can take a piece as they pass. Avoid spaces that look crowded or where people are not wearing masks and be sure to sanitize hands often.

•            If you decide to forgo trick-or-treating altogether, consider hiding individually wrapped candy throughout your house or yard, and let the kids go find it. For older kids, make it a challenge! Write clues that lead them from one spot to another – with the end game being a basket full of Halloween candy.

Mask Up!

•            Darth Vader’s helmet is strong, but it won’t stop the force of COVID. Build your child’s costume around a cloth mask. Follow Colorado’s Department of Public Health tips and tricks guidelines for Halloween and remember that a costume mask is not a substitute for a cloth mask. A costume mask should not be used unless it is made of two or more layers of breathable fabric that covers the mouth and nose and doesn’t leave gaps around the face.

•            Be sure to test the mask first to ensure that it does not make it difficult for your child to breathe. A costume mask over top of a protective cloth mask can be dangerous.

Stay Close to Home, and Far From Others!

•            If you go out, stay in your neighborhood and avoid large groups. Stay with your household members and avoid mingling with people from other households. If you find yourself with people that are not from your immediate household, practice social distancing.

•            If you really want/need to be with others, try to stick with people who are already part of your family’s quaranTEAM.

Find a Silver Lining!

COVID is spooky, but it does not need to scare away Halloween traditions. Use it as a catalyst for starting a new tradition. Now that Gus is older, I have to say that about two days after Halloween, I am HATING all that candy. Why not use COVID as an opportunity to say bye-bye to sugar-overload? Family pumpkin carving contest? Porch decorating? Spooky movie night? Candlelight ghost stories? Halloween baking/cookie decorating? Homemade glow in the dark slime? Virtual costume contest (that can, in the future shift to in-person)? Mailing candy to our military troops? 

COVID has certainly changed the way we do almost everything in our lives, but not all of it has been negative. Many of the lifestyle changes we’ve adopted this year may end of becoming permanent changes even after the pandemic has ended because we’ve realized what is truly important and valuable in our lives. This Halloween will look different, but that does not mean worse. Be together, create memories, and be safe.

Happy Halloween!

Model UN Supports the Development of Globally Minded Citizens

On January 30th, Boulder Country Day middle school students participated in the annual Model United Nations exercise. In teams, students represented a member country by researching it, writing resolutions on current issues it faces, and defending those resolutions at a gathering called the MUN General Assembly. Through this process, students learned about international relations, developed empathy, and gained a better understanding of how issues across the world affect us all. As an authorized IB Middle Years Program (MYP), BCD uses this curricular enhancement to support the IB goal of developing globally minded students. 

“It helps you to be more aware of the world around you so that you know more than just what’s happening the U.S.­­ ­- you know about the entire world. It also teaches you that history effects everything and it’s not just something you learn because you have to.

            – BCD 8th grader

More on BCD’s Middle School

More on the IB program

Perspectacles – A Critical Lens for Distance Learning

Earlier this week I went to the grocery store near my home. The isles had shifted to one-way traffic patterns and the floor was marked with red arrows and landing pads indicating where I could and could not stand. At the cashier, the woman standing in front of me was complaining openly about the situation, her inconvenience and general dissatisfaction. As I listened, I realized that I was feeling similar emotions… Why were the Cheerios I wanted not in stock??

Reflecting back at home, I realized I needed “perspectacles.” The Urban Dictionary defines perspectacles as a magical glass that somehow gives you the power of perspective. It is also a movement that has been used in schools and other organizations around the country to talk about empathy, perspective, leadership, and compassion.

A few years ago, I tuned in to the writing of Glennon Doyle and her often viral blogposts. In 2014, Glennon wrote a post about her gratitude for everyday things in her home. With COVID-19 as a reality check, Glennon as my inspiration, and perspectacles on, I share with you some of the things for which I am grateful.

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I have pantry shelves that are stocked with food. It’s like a mini-market – in my house.

I have toilet paper. Think about that… Paper that we – flush – down toilets. Granted, my household supply is limited, and we are rationing squares, but I live in a place where soft, two-ply tissue with ripples for cleaning one’s backside is a norm. It’s a luxury that until recently I allowed to freely flow off my wall-mounted dispenser.

I have CLEAN water that I can drink straight from the tap without fear of getting sick. Not only can I get water from my sinks, but I also have a couple of show and two outdoor spickets. In addition, I have electricity. There are switches all over the inside of my house that I can turn on any time I want – day or night.

This one deserves a moment of silence…

I have a COFFEE POT. I put a little capsule into this magic machine, push a button and, shazam, a hot cup of liquid energy pours out on demand. I can do this as many times as I want – every day.

Thank the lord for coffee.

I have internet and my son’s teachers are delivering his BCD education right to our kitchen table. His middle school teachers, just like your child’s preschool teachers, are pouring their hearts and souls into making sure that he feels supported while also navigating the challenge of teaching children on giant conference calls.

With my perspectacles on, I see that by connecting on Zoom and checking in via phone and email, his teachers are emphasizing the parts of education that I consider most important:

  • He’s learning to be flexible and adapt to new things.
  • He’s learning to show up for people – even when it’s not easy.
  • He’s learning that his teachers care and are there with him – even at our kitchen table.
  • He’s learning how people at school and in communities around the world can work together and support each other in new and innovative ways.

I hope that you will wear your perspectacles as you consider the heartfelt energy our preschool teachers are putting into supporting your child and family. They are working tirelessly to think of creative ways to bring the magic of our classrooms into your homes.

Listen to Me!

Over the last week, I spent some time thinking about the skill of listening and revisiting Mary Renck Jalongo’s book, Learning to Listen and Listening to Learn. In her book, Jalongo poignantly describes how listening is a skill that is commonly misunderstood and hard to define because it often has different meanings to different people. To emphasize this point, Jalongo shares the following examples: If a teacher says to a child, “You’re not listening,” it often means, “You’re not thinking along with me.” If a parent says the same thing to a child, it usually means, “You’re not doing as I say.”

Learning to listen may seem pretty simple, but actually, it’s not. Consider this… When learning to listen and the skill of listening to learn, children must practice effective listening – meaning they must be able to:

  • Take in both verbal and non-verbal messages,
  • Attend and keep our attention focused completely on the message, and
  • Interpret or understand the message.

In addition, they must also be able to filter out distractions, process information, ask relevant questions, and formulate connections. Yowzah!

Now, consider this paradox… Listening is the skill most often used – but least often taught. With this in mind, we believe that learning to use effective listening must be intentionally taught.

In preschool, we teach effective listening skills by practicing “Whole Body Listening” using the descriptive language listed below:

Eyes = look at the person talking to you

Ears = both ears ready to hear

Mouth = quiet – not talking, humming, or making sounds

Hands = quiet in laps, pockets, or by your sides

Feet = quiet on the floor

Body = faces the speaker

Brain = thinking about what is being said

Heart = caring about what the other person is saying

Right about now, some of you are probably wondering – Okay, that’s great. But really…

How do we teach effective listening skills and what can I do at home? Below are some tips and strategies that we recommend:

  • Encourage listening by varying the volume of your voice. Sometimes, children listen best when we whisper.
  • When reading aloud, pause at strategic times to check for understanding by asking who, what, where, or why questions.
  • Be aware of background noise and interruptions.
  • Don’t start talking until your child is showing you “Whole Body Listening.”
  • Keep directions short and use simple, sequential steps.
  • Talk slowly enough to give children time to process information.
  • Ensure children know WHY what you are telling them is important (keep it short).
  • Balance questions that have one right answer with open ended questions that can be answered in a variety of ways.
  • Provide fun opportunities to practice listening. Talk on the phone, listen to children’s podcast, play an audio book.
  • Practice giving your child times of undivided attention. Turn the TV and/or your phone ringer off.
  • Model active listening yourself and characteristics of “Whole Body Listening.”

What To Do When The “Force” is NOT With You – Intentional Teaching and Understanding Children’s Play

How The Batman Brigade Changed My Understanding of Play

Let me set the scene… Three preschool age children are tearing around the room using quick zig-zag motions – climbing on tables, jumping off chairs, darting out of sight. They’re wearing capes that they fashioned for themselves by ripping open pink skirts commandeered from a box of dress-up clothes. Locked and loaded with Lego guns, they’re on a relentless hunt for bad guys. In their minds, they are saving the world. In reality, they’re terrorizing my classroom and destroying my confidence as a teacher.

This was a “Calgon, take me away!” moment… And, the children had me questioning if I was cut out to be a teacher. They pushed me to the edge and I almost threw in the towel – until I decided to join their forces. I needed to better understand what was driving their need for this type of play. Why was it so attractive?

Let’s dig into that scene a bit more… It’s 1995. We’re in a US Department of Defense school in a small town in southern Germany. The children in my class have parents who are either members of the US Armed forces or diplomats from former Eastern-Block countries. Together, the class speaks 13 different languages. And, just a few hundred kilometers away, the Bosnian War is going strong. The children are communicating with each other through play to process their emotions, try on different roles and grasp a better understanding of what is going on in the world around them.

Once I better understood their need, the WHY that was controlling their inner Batman, I was able to support their need for exploring war play.

War play, perhaps more than another other type of activity, is super attractive to children. It helps them to feel strong and in control – “masters of their own universe” – as they plan for and carry out attacks. According to Nancy Carlsson and Diane Levin in their book, Who’s Calling the Shots, war play fits nicely into how children think. They typically group things into simple one-dimensional categories such as good vs. bad or sick vs. healthy. You can be one or the other – but not both. War play provides children with opportunities to feel a sense of power as they experiment with their thoughts and feelings within these categories. We typically see an uptick in this type of play when children are experiencing a difficult event, such as divorce, a sick parent, or in the case of 1995, a nearby conflict. The COVID-19 pandemic now joins the list of catalysts.

The Atlantic recently published an article about how the coronavirus is influencing children’s play. In the article, Kate Cray writes that “Play is children’s language. They act out pretend scenarios to express concerns, ask questions, and, crucially, reshape a narrative. During pretend play, children are driving the plot and can change the outcome of a scary situation or try out different solutions to a problem.” With these needs in mind, Cray goes on to reassure parents that they should not discourage this type of play. Children need outlets for processing emotions, coping with worries and fears and practicing creative problem-solving skills. While many parents would agree that this is all well and good, many of you wonder – what you can do to support your child’s play as they process emotions?

Below are some strategies suggested by Carlsson and Levin:

  • Get to know the scene. What are the themes or storylines in your child’s play (good vs. bad, sickness, family dynamics)? Who are the main characters? What are they talking about? What are the problems that they are solving? What strategies are being used to solve problems? How much time is devoted to the various themes? Is your child inventing scenarios or situations or are they imitating something they experienced personally or saw on television? When observing the scene, think about strategies you might use when joining a conversation cluster at a cocktail party… Most of us will listen in for a while to determine what people are talking about before contributing to the conversation so that we don’t take it over. Follow this same etiquette with your child.
  • Once you understand what’s happening in your child’s play, try to participate without taking over. The power in pretend play is the feeling of control and adults need to make sure that we don’t interfere. One way to ensure that you don’t take over is to limit your language to making comments that describe what is happening such as, “I see that your dog is sick and that you’re rushing him to the emergency room.” Or, “I hear you talking about using your superpowers to kill the bad guys.” Another strategy is to use open-ended questions (questions that cannot be answered with yes/no or a response that is right or wrong). For example, “What do you think you can do to help your dog feel better?” Or, “How do your superpowers help you to fight the bad guys?”
  • Try to learn about the needs being worked on in play. Does your child’s play focus on being powerful and strong? Are fears or insecurities such as getting lost, dying, or monsters surfacing? If so, try to find a quiet moment to talk with your child. Reassure your child without belittling their feelings or making promises that everything will be okay. You can also read books aloud to your child that cover similar topics. I really like the book, Kate’s Giants. The message in this story is, “If you can think it in, then you can think it out. Just take a deep breath before you think.” Honestly, we could all benefit that advice right now…
  • During times when the world is unsettled, look for simple ways to help your child feel a sense of empowerment and control. Provide opportunities for your child to make limited choices within a non-negotiable decision that is already made. For example, you can say, “It’s time for lunch. (non-negotiable) Would you like to have peanut butter and jelly or egg salad?” (choice point) Or, “It’s time to get dressed. (non-negotiable) Would you like your red shirt or your green shirt? (choice point) Experiencing an ability to make meaningful choices will help your child feel in control of their world.

Some of you may be thinking “you know, I think my kids are battling each other with those makeshift swords simply because it’s fun” and in many ways that could be very true. Its fast pace, level of activity and accompanying sound-effects (Ka-POW!) are appealing. But there are often subtle (or not so subtle) feelings behind the play themes your children choose. Be observant, show interest and look or any patterns that may indicate that you child could use a bit of extra emotional support.

If you are noticing changes in your child’s play and would like to connect, please feel free to reach out to me. In addition, if you sense that your child is struggling or acting out, you are always welcome to contact Sterling Kranjcec, BCD’s school counselor at

We’re here for you!

Parents need to know that distance learning does not define their worth as a parent.

Take heart…and then take these few simple actions that can smooth the journey.

Distance learning programs designed to bring school curriculums online and into households have been launched by schools all over the globe these past few weeks. For some parents, this may be exciting – a dream come true! For others, it might feel like a challenge from an episode of Fear Factor, or perhaps as though you are being forced to take the stage in a performance for which you did not audition. Gulp!

But, here’s what I want to say to parents – take a deep breath and know that nobody is going to judge you by how well you do – or don’t do – distance learning.

This past weekend I read an article by Dr. Laura Markham, on her website Aha!, about the uncomfortable feeling that some parents may have as they prepare to support their child’s education from home. Several key ideas in her blog resonated with me. However, one point really stood out to me: The situation we are in right now is NOT homeschooling…

Homeschooling is something parents intentionally choose to do. Rather, this is taking on schoolwork in our homes because of mandated shelter-in-place orders and parents should know – they are not in this alone – we are all in this together. As parents and teachers, we are going to find ourselves partnering in new and innovative ways as we transition our teaching and student learning into your home environments – hopefully as seamlessly as possible. At BCD, we believe that the experience of preschool is a valuable tool in the development of children and as such schools should be committed to providing this crucial component of learning and socialization during these tough times to the best of their abilities.

We believe parents need to know that distance learning does not determine their value as a parent. We need to let parents know that we are here for them and that we will support them along the way to ensure they don’t feel overwhelmed. And to that end, we need to offer them tools. Ways that they can set themselves and their children up for success. Below is a list of action items that parents can use to make this period of ‘distance learning’ run smoother. Note, I share some key points here from Dr. Markham’s article as well as some of my own advice.

  • Make the school’s schedule your new best friend. If the schedule they sent doesn’t work for you, make one that does and use it. A schedule will save your sanity and will help prevent every minute of the day from becoming an invitation to a power struggle with your child.
  • Preview any learning activities you can and decide what you can reasonably accomplish. The good news is, if your school is being mindful of children’s needs, as well as the time and energy required of parents, then the schoolwork your school created for your child probably won’t take long. Let your school know what is working and what is not through whatever feedback forum they provided.
  • For Preschoolers, reassure your child that nobody is at school. Your child may not understand what is happening and why they’re not at school. I created a short YouTube video for the families at my school in which I take them on a tour around our preschool building and show them that, really, no one is at school. Ask your student’s teacher if they might be able to provide a message similar to this and I bet they will happily oblige.
  • If you can only do one thing with your preschool child, READ. Research shows that absolute number one thing we can do for our children is to read and model reading. Doing so helps to nurture their love of reading and helps to ensure that they grow up to be a reader – not just someone who knows how to read.
  • Expect emotional development to be on the agenda. We’re all struggling in our own ways right now, and your child is no exception. According to Dr. Markham, some children show this by misbehaving. Others are surly or torment their siblings. You probably have less patience than usual, but your child needs your help to work through emotions they may not be able to articulate. Remind yourself that your child is trying to cope with this unprecedented time, just like you are. Schools understand this and should be making it a high priority within their lesson programming.
  • Give yourself a break and remember to practice self-care. Think of the safety instructions flight attendants give before take-off and put the oxygen mask on yourself first. Be sure to take care of your own needs so that you can better attend to your child’s.
  • You don’t have to be Mary Poppins and you don’t have to suddenly be a model teacher. Resist the urge to compare yourself (or your child) to others. This is new for all of us. It’s not going to be perfect. Focus on keeping things simple and fun as you settle into your new distance learning routines and platforms.

Finally, I cannot resist sharing this Seuss-inspired distance learning poem I found on the internet (source unknown.) I think it really sums up the message the teachers of the world want parents to know right now:

“I will teach you in a room, I will teach you using Zoom, I will teach you while I’m in my house, I will teach you with my mouse, I will teach you here or there, I will teach you because I care…”

With gratitude and support,

Kath Courter, Head of Preschool at BCD

More on BCD’s Distance Learning program

More on BCD’s Preschool program

More on BCD’s Elementary program

More on BCD’s Middle School program

The Use of Technology and Social Media with Middle School Students

I recently attended the National Association of Independent School (NAIS) annual conference where the keynote speaker was Jonathan Haidt, social psychologist and author of The Coddling of the American Mind.  Haidt’s address focused on the alarming increase of mental health needs of children in Generation Z. One of his greatest concerns, mirrored by many other academics and professionals, is the potential negative impact social media can have on children’s mental well-being, specifically with regards to depression and anxiety. With this mind, I’d like to focus this blog on a discussion of social media and how it can impact our own middle school community.

Based on his own research and that of others, Haidt argues that although social media has the positive attribute of connecting people, the way that many young people use social media can be harmful. Specifically, he argues that the culture of instant gratification and ubiquitous ratings on every picture and post leads to negative repercussions on developing minds. Notably, he believes these negative repercussions can occur even if children have limited access to social media. In fact, he noted that kids who stopped using social media altogether indicated decreased levels of anxiety and depression. His arguments and research can be found on his website:

With these types of concerns in mind, I sought to gain a better understanding of the role social media plays in our own middle school community. To that end, I surveyed our middle school students on their phone and social media use. Based on the 85 students that replied to this survey, approximately 85% of 6th through 8th graders report owning a phone and bringing that phone to school. With regards to how they perceive the impact of their social media use, about 19% of students said that social media negatively impacts their emotional well-being. Additionally, approximately 10% indicated that they have seen their friends engage in mean behavior either online or on their phones. While this was just an informal survey and not a comprehensive research undertaking – I do think the findings are useful. These statistics indicate that for at least some of our students, social media may have some troubling and harmful effects.  

Given what we know about the potential for social media to impact our children, and given the prevalence of phones in this age group, the question is what we can do as parents and educators to limit or mitigate the potential harm and how we can be in partnership to ensure consistency. I believe the policies we have at BCD with regards to phone usage is an important first step. Student phones must be turned off and kept in lockers during the school day (with exceptions made for emergencies). I believe this policy has reduced the desire of our students to want to check and use their phones throughout the day. Additionally, we have an Acceptable Use Policy (AUP), which is an agreement of how students will use technology appropriately, and a firewall that blocks inappropriate content. Also in 6th grade, we teach students how to use their computers for appropriate school use only. As parents, I think we need to be vigilant in the supervision of our children’s social media usage and should implement parental controls when possible. Below I have attached a list of resources provided by Gabe Hernan, our Director of Technology, about monitoring online use and restricting access. I know that these resources have come in handy in my own home with my children.

Haidt concluded his keynote by recommending that schools ban access to social media during the day and he urged parents and kids to delay social media use until High School. To this end, I recommend that parents check out the “Wait Until 8th” campaign and pledge ( that aims to “empower parents to delay giving children a smartphone until at least 8th grade.” This campaign illustrates how parents can work together in supporting one another and creating similar strategies and rules together. 

Ultimately, we want our students to remember the BCD motto of Respect Yourself, Respect Others, and Take Responsibility for Your Actions – whether that is in school or out of school, online or in person.  I will continue to take a hard look at our own middle school policies and work to develop strategies to empower students to know the best ways to use social media. I appreciate your partnership as we help everyone navigate the digital landscape in a way that students feel connected and safe.

Monitoring and Blocking Resources

ARTICLE: Everything You Need to Know About Parental Controls – Great overview of how it all works

Microsoft Family Safety – Block sites, set time limits, and see activity reports

Circle with Disney – Filter content, limit screen time and set a bedtime for every device in the home

OurPact – Mobile guidance for your family, available for iOS and Android

Screen Time – Parental controls for iOS, Android and Kindle devices

Curbi – Parental controls for Android and Apple mobile devices

ParentKit – Control and schedule what is on your child’s iPod, iPad or iPhone

NetSanity – Parental controls for iOS

FamilyTime – Parental controls for iOS and Android

Net Nanny – Parental controls for Android and iOS

Mobile Fence – Parental controls and GPS tracking for Android devices

Verizon Family Base – Monitor wireless activity and set usage limits

AT&T Parental Controls – Manage internet and email activity on computers

T-Mobile Family Allowances – Manage minutes, messages and downloads on phones


Have additional resources that should be shared?  Please email

Classroom ‘Flooding,’ a Literacy Advantage

Children are acquiring literacy from birth; from dinner table conversations promoting oral language development, to bedtime storytelling demonstrating that meaning can be made from text, to creating shopping lists which help children learn sounds and alphabetic symbols.

Good educators understand this and work to know and support each student where they are, or, where they fall in the ‘Continuum of Literacy.’ (Fountas and Pinnell)

Based on the continuum of literacy framework, targeted instruction is the current gold standard in literacy programs. What is targeted instruction? It’s not quite individualized curriculum; it’s closer to a tailored curriculum. It begins with collecting information, also called a ‘body of evidence,’ to determine what students know and what they need to know next. Tools such as benchmark assessments, running records, authentic tasks, teacher observations, student work samples, and, in some cases, standardized tests allow for the creation of a ‘literacy profile.’ From there, educators tailor curricular decisions by student, organize groupings, plan strategies for teaching reading and writing, discern how to appropriately-level resources, and create productive learning activities.

Targeted instruction is then implemented through ‘literacy blocks.’ Literacy blocks are 90-minute periods of uninterrupted literacy instruction in reading and writing. Studies show they are the best way to maximize instruction and make sufficient progress. (FCRR) Boulder Country Day School students in Kindergarten – 2nd grade begin every morning with a ninety-minute literacy block called The Daily 5. (Boushey and Moser) Students select from five purposeful reading and writing choices and work independently toward personalized goals while the teacher meets individual needs through whole group, small group, and one on one instruction. BCD’s Learning Specialist Team of literacy experts also ‘floods’ the classroom to further reduce the teacher/student ratio. The early literary advantage created by the Daily 5 is among many benefits we are able to offer at BCD. 

More on BCD’s Elementary program.

Sources: FCRR (Florida Center for Reading Research)Boushey, Gail and Moser, Joan. The Daily 5: Fostering Literacy in the Elementary Grades. Stenhouse Publishers and Pembroke Publishers, 2014,Irene Fountas, Lesley University, Gay Su Pinnell, The Ohio State University. The Fountas & Pinnell Literacy Continuum. 2016.

Start the Momentum Early – Why invest in a PS-8 education?

For several years running, usually around the time reenrollment contracts are due, parents have asked me about investing in PS – 8 education. “College is so expensive,” they say, “Shouldn’t we save our resources when our children are younger so that we can afford to send them to the college of their choice?” 

My usual answer is that investing in children during their formative, younger years pays dividends down the road. Even still, as the cost of college education continues to rise, I remain firm in my conviction that an investment in the primary years is what best sets students up for success in later life.

When it comes to raising confident and competent children, the importance of investing in a high-quality education when children are young is critical. This makes sense if you think about the rapid pace at which students learn when they are younger. From language development in toddlers to critical thinking in elementary to navigating the social context of middle school, our kids need exceptional school environments to help them navigate what is becoming an increasingly complex world.

Researchers have been looking at this questions for many years now, and there are at least four key reasons to make this investment.

Literacy – Literacy serves as the springboard for education, and students who attend schools that focus on early literacy have an advantage over those who do not. A study run by the American Educational Research Association, investigated the impact of early education by tracking nearly 3,000 students from preschool through their 11th birthday. In short, the research determined that a student who cannot read at grade level by third grade becomes four times less likely to graduate by age 19 than students who are meeting standards.

Brain Development – Human brains grow more during the first five years of life than any other development period, with the first three serving as a mold for the organ’s architecture. Experiences during these formative years determine the brain’s organizational development for the remainder of life. Consequently, these years impact academic abilities, social-emotional skills, and executive functioning.

Young brains are also “plastic” brains. That is, they have the ability to change, or find new neural pathways, much more easily than older brains. The earlier we can nurture and develop those pathways, including an openness to new ones, the more easily brains can adapt to future opportunities.

Natural Explorers – Children in primary school are natural detectives, journalists and mad scientists. They love to explore and take in new material. They are also at the prime season of their life for absorbing information. Schools that use their resources to provide a broad-based, but balanced, curriculum have an advantage over those that do not. For example, early exposure to world languages, the arts, and STEM classes increase intellectual development. Furthermore, a diverse and rich curriculum increases the opportunities our children have to develop the ability to make cross-curricular connections and devise wide-ranging solutions.

Social-Emotional Growth – Academic and social-emotional growth are not mutually exclusive at any point in education, but they are most connected during elementary and middle school. Skills developed through practice, such as self-regulation and social interaction, have positive effects that are evident throughout an entire lifetime. Furthermore, developing a sense of empathy and understanding is critically important at younger ages. This is especially true in today’s world as cooperation and collaboration are rising to the top among skills critical for the workplace.  

BCD invests heavily in all of the above. We use a “flooding” model for literacy instruction, staffing each grade in K – 3 with four specialists from our Learning Center for 30 minutes each day. This intensive model lowers our student-teacher ratio and allows our students to receive more personalized instruction than they would get from their homeroom teacher.

We provide a broad-based and balanced curriculum to engage young brains and to expose them to multiple pathways of learning. Preschoolers start world language classes when they are three years-old, elementary and middle schoolers benefit from diverse curriculum taught by subject areas specialists in the Arts, STEM, technology, world languages, PE, and library. And, middle schoolers engage and participate in our Explore program, a series of electives designed to expose them to a rich array of topics and subjects that more closely resembles a college course catalog than middle school.

Finally, we teach social emotional skills through our Responsive Classroom and DDMS curriculum. As Preschool Head Kath Courter likes to say, “Pushing over a block tower at age five is kind of like annoying a colleague at the copier much later in life.” Teaching these skills and creating an emotionally safe and welcoming environment within which to learn them only adds to the education our children receive.

Simply put, investing “early and often” in a PS – 8th grade education is good policy and better practice.  Students that receive the benefit of that investment outperform their peers, are better prepared for high school and beyond, and have a stronger and more developed sense of self. In addition, they build on the skills and habits they develop at a young age and are more likely to succeed in a college or university environment when the time comes.

Read about BCD’s Preschool program.

Read about BCD’s Elementary program.

Read about BCD’s Middle School program.

Schedule a tour to see what makes BCD so special.

Register for our August 11, 2020 Virtual Open House at 4pm